The important day.

Today was not especially carved for me, today was dull and lack lustre. There was not a slice of weather that I was particularly fond of, not a scent of fine baking and I drank my tea alone, padding over bare wood floors.
I stepped into the garden once or twice, overcast it was outside, and I could barely open my eyes to the colourless glare. Not long after I had hung my sheets out to dry did thick thuds of slow rain begin to pound at the window. I went on with my day, as you always should with a day off, cleaning and catching up with myself. Whilst my stomach has been a tangle of light emotion lately, it has been bittersweet. Each day I recieve a different pain or a different pang, each day I find myself pondering on what I should just simply be getting on with.
A quick proposal was made by a friend, and so i ventured out into the reality I had left at the pub door just last night.

Ryan Dunn died today. And for a reason beyond my knowledge, the news has hit me hard. And it is rather mean to say, I should think, but it is not so much that it is he who has died (and in a pathetic way, I find, as the details surface). Remnants of death linger in the air today, the quiet of a graveyard has swept the city.
I find that every one is solemn and self-collected. Each strangers face a pale shadow of what it probably was.
I set off at a fair pace to reach Lauren's place for dinner, ignoring the change in the rain, enjoying the cool I recieved. It was some where near the start of this journey that I witnessed an accident, and 'Time Of Your Life' and 'Last Train Home' played on Radio 1.
And then the emotion swept over me, the strong feeling I could not ignore. Today is important.
I searched the memorised dates in my head and came back with nothing. What is today? Why have I the sudden strength in my chest, in my aching limbs that something will or has happened today?
Just 'She', that's all I am to all that pass me, and yet I, today more than any other, feel I have a purpose. I am supposed to let some one know, I am supposed to witness something. To spread a word. I am supposed to aid, I am supposed to be the victim. Today is the day.
And who to tell?! I battled with myself for a time, paced further into the grey haze that was the city below my step, below my view. The yellow warmth of a friends cosied home was as bittersweet as my stomach has been lately.

Of course, we have slipped into tomorrow, now our today, and that feeling went no further. I don't feel I have wasted it, however. For now that the day has slipped by, and I am still without knowledge of this feeling of importance I recieved, I shall and can only assume that it was the beginning of something hopefully wonderful.
Where my life starts another chapter.

My father always spoke of seven year cycles. And if this is a theory true and to live by, my next is certainly approaching, rapidly with my 21st birthday.